So this forum that deals specifically with helping victims of verbal and emotional abuse is really getting on my nerves.
I would even go so far as to say that I feel they are being emotionally abusive……that’s ironic for a site that is supposed to help victims of emotional abuse isn’t it now?
I joined this forum back in November 2009 but hadn’t revisited it or attempted to post since that time.
When I did attempt to post (first time on April 15, and second time on April 17) my posts never showed up.
It doesn’t say anywhere on the site that new members are placed on moderation or it’s so well hidden that Sherlock Holmes himself couldn’t find it!!
I looked everywhere trying to find a reason why my posts weren’t visible. Help, FAQ, other topics, nothing…..
I couldn’t even find out how to contact the admin/moderating staff.
So I posted as my status message first that I was very frustrated with this forum and then later that it was pretty hard to ask for help if nobody could see my posts.
A friend at another forum–the person who told me about the site in the first place when I was venting about my mother– vouched for me so I was taken off moderation.
If she hadn’t vouched for me I still wouldn’t know what was going on as the site made no attempt to contact me re any issues.
However, in the same message where I was informed that I had been taken off moderation I was also chewed out for posting the status messages and both of them have disappeared.
There are no visible rules that I can find about what can or cannot be posted in the status messages area, so I guess I was supposed to be a mind reader, shut up, and go away never to be heard from again since I couldn’t even find out how/where to contact them about the problems!!
They are saying that I am not allowed to discuss (even in very general terms) my posts not showing up because it will give those who join only to attack the members/moderators/etc a clue why THEIR posts don’t show up.
I asked the person who chewed me out re the status messages (and indirectly re the second post about why my first post wasn’t showing up) how she justifies treating me the same as someone who had joined just to attack members/moderators since I truly feel that if I were going to attack anyone I would not have waited 6 months to make my first post.
I guess I’m not allowed to be frustrated with them even though they are the most user-unfriendly forum I’ve ever dealt with in eleven (11) years online.
I guess I’m not allowed to say anything anywhere about my posts not being visible even though I said nothing about being on moderation (mostly because I didn’t have a clue that I was on moderation!!)
Do they really think that making me wait 5 days for one post to show up, deleting the other post, deleting 2 status messages, expecting me to know unwritten rules, and then abusing me via a personal message is going to make me feel like participating any further at their forum?
If I want to be emotionally abused, I don’t need to visit any forum since I can just call my mother, she’s the west coast distributor of emotional and verbal abuse!!
And even after they allowed my one measly acceptable post, I received no feedback or support from the other members of the forum. I’m feeling like I’m being ignored and that hurts at least as much as the games my mother plays.
I’m not sure who I feel more abused by: the moderators/members of this forum or my mother. Right now, it’s too close to call!!
Am I going to be active at this forum even after they took me off moderation? I DON’T THINK SO!!